Jath

Losing Hair - the Nads way

I love infomercials, including a classic one for Nads hair removal. I know what you're asking. Does it work? Just check it out and see.

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I sat in a tiny theater today with 15 people, two of whom were Patrick Duffy and Larry Hagman from the TV show Dallas. They were there to see Duffy's son's two new one-act plays. Hagman looked really good, especially for a guy who almost died from liver failure not long ago. I was so tempted to go up and say, "Hey, you're that guy from I Dream of Jeanie. What have you done since then?"

Tonight, at a play, I asked if I could take my hot tea into the theater because my stomach didn't feel too good. Reviewers get special treatment sometimes, so they let me in, but warned me not to spill it. Five minutes later I spilled half of it on my lap. None of it got on the floor or seat, but I had to sit there and pretend like nothing happened as hot tea scalded my stomach and groin.

I saw Fiona Apple's big sister in a show tonight. She was great - the show was awful. She's a cabaret singer and she had to sing these bad hard rock songs, and she had to dance. It was sad. At intermission I wanted to kidnap her and sneak her into some other musical that didn't suck.

After not watching Will & Grace for a few years I decided to watch the finale. Why oh why did I do that? They ripped off the Mad About You finale, only Will & Grace did it much worse. The only thing that could have saved the night is if everyone on ER had been killed, instead of the usual several people, like every season ending episode of ER.

I bought a couple of cereals with no sweetener of any kind. Now I know why they all have sweeteners.

The president spoke yesterday on TV. I'm wondering if people on the East Coast missed the season finale of How I Met Your Mother to hear Bush say exactly what everyone already knew he was going to say. For those of you who missed it, here's a recap: "Immigrants OK. Border weak. Not listening to your 1-900 calls. Ted and Robin get together. Marshall and Lily break up." Those last two are from the finale of How I Met Your Mother ... at least I think they are.

No matter how hard you wish it, rice cakes can never be ice cream. They can only be edible saucers for ice cream.

A bit of round ball

Our director is out of town, so I decided to let my friend Rachel choose which classic jath she wanted to see, because she's having a tough week. Her favorite is jathsketball. And who could ever get tired of me taking on a kid in a game of one-on-one.

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Tonight during a one-woman show the performer fell down. It fit the story so no one thought anything about it until she shouted, "This is not part of the play." People rushed to her aid and an ambulance came. They wrapped her knee and gave her a shot and continued with the show, only sitting. At the end, Kirk Douglas walked on stage (it was at the Kirk Douglas Theatre) and praised her for her bravery. It was one of those moments that makes theater something that TV and film can never be. Also, I loved the show so I got to give it a good review. Thank God, because it would have sucked to trash it after that.

I have figure out the only diet that works for me. I only eat when I'm awake so it involves a lot of sleeping pills.

I refused to give up. I went to Ticketmaster.com every day. And then, it happened. A Roger Waters ticket showed up. And I bought it. And now I am broke. Whee!

I'm getting close to giving in and watching American Idol. I have nothing against the show. I just thought when I saw the first commercial, and when I watched it once, what I still think today. "This is a new version of Star Search, only without the models and comics." I wish someone could explain it to me. Am I wrong or is it people singing adult contemporary pop and then being judged by a washed up singer and two goofballs? And yet, it seems to mean so much to people that I feel I could watch it once or twice a season so I know the names of the contestants. But it won't stop me from being confused.

Of all the major music acts, the only one I've never seen that I always wanted to is Roger Waters. He never tours. Except that now he is and somehow I missed the day they went on sale for the Hollywood Bowl. :-(

Trial by Jury - the saga begins

It's not that I am against being on a jury. If they would have trials from 9 a.m. - noon I would gladly do it. But as a freelancer I would lose all of my jobs if I ended up on a trial. So I was nervous when I got the jury summons. This is what I did.

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